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Scott Lance Smith

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Scott Lance Smith last won the day on February 23

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About Scott Lance Smith

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    American Infidel
  • Birthday 05/27/1968

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  1. Hope this brightens your day: Teacher: "Class, we'll have only half a day of school today morning." Students: "Yaaayyy!" Teacher: "We'll have the other half this afternoon." A neighbor asked his friend, who was celebrating 50 years of marriage, what the secret was to a long and happy marriage? His friend replied, "When we were first married, we vowed to go out twice a week no matter how little money we had and we have done so for 50 years." "Twice a week, you say?" "Yeah. She goes out on Tuesday and I go out on Friday." Worrying is like a rocking chair... you can rock forever but it will get you nowhere. 15 Places To Survive Zombie Apocalypse Scott
  2. Hope this brightens your day: Lady (to her doctor): "What l am worried about is my height and not my weight." Doctor: "How come?" Lady: "According to my weight, my height should be 7 feet, 8 inches." In a kids bedroom: 3 year old: I can't sleep Father: Why not? 3 year old: There are scary monsters under my bed. Father: Scarier than your mother? 3 year old: "zzz" “Change is our nature and it starts where we decide so let us reaffirm our enduring spirit by doing so.” Square Foot Planting Guide Scott
  3. Hope this brightens your day: Sally was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 5-year-old daughter to answer the phone. “Mommy can’t come to the phone to talk to you right now. She’s hitting the bottle.” Our Lamaze class included a tour of the pediatric wing of the hospital. When a new baby was brought into the nursery, all the women tried to guess its weight, but the guy standing next to me was the only male to venture a number. "Looks like 9 pounds," he offered confidently. "This must not be your first," I said. "Oh, yes," he said, "it's my first." "Then how would you know the weight of a baby?" I asked. He shrugged, "I'm a fisherman." Johnathan asked his young son, "Greg, do you think I’m a bad father?" "My name is Andrew," replied his son. My Dad bought my Mom a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, I asked how she was doing with it. "Oh," said My Dad, "I persuaded her to switch to a clarinet." "How come?" I asked. "Well," he answered, "because with a clarinet, she can't sing." As he was standing in line at the grocery store checkout counter, a friend of John's noticed he was purchasing a dozen roses and a card."You in trouble with Jill?" the friend asked John. "Nope!" was John's reply. "Preventive maintenance." One month into Marine Corps training in San Diego, California, we were preparing for a ten-mile march in 100-degree weather when a jeep drove up with a large radio in the back. "Who knows anything about radios?" our drill instructor asked. Several hands went up, and anticipating a ride in the jeep, recruits began listing their credentials. Everything from a degree in communications to a part-time job in a repair shop was declared. The DI listened to all the contenders, then pointed to the most qualified. "You!" he barked. "Carry the radio." Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sail. Explore. Dream. Discover. The longer that something false is held as true, the more it becomes true and the less it becomes false. "A man's reach should exceed his grasp..." - Oscar Wild PVC Target Scott
  4. Hope this brightens your day: I found a rock that is 1760 feet long... It must be a MILESTONE! A West Virginia state trooper, stopped a woman for going 15 miles over the speed limit. After he handed her a ticket, she asked him, "Don't you give out warnings?" "Yes, ma'am," he replied. "They're all up and down the road. They say, 'Speed Limit 55.'" Old Furniture Polish - Boil two tea bags in a quart of water and let cool. Soak a soft cloth in the tea and wring out. Wipe off dirt and old polish, let dry, buff, and then decide if you need to reapply polish. 3% 56 Lists To make When You Are Feeling Down Scott
  5. Are there any militia groups in the Savannah Georgia Area?
  6. I (slscsi) have 1270+ Positive Transactions on eBay, 432 on Bonanza & Listia Scottlsmith75 (600) 97%.. Adapter - Blank – M16, Anti Fog Lens Cleaning Drops – Two, Army Awards & Decorations W Case, Assualt/Water Backpack – DCU, Band - Grn Helmet – Five, Head Liner Helmet-New, Bag - BDU – Chem Suit, Ballistic Collar - Body Armor –Two – Grn Left & Right, Belt Extender - Pistol– Grn, Black Dress Belt – 2, Buckle - Brass Dress Belt – 2, Boots - Army/Altama Tan 11R, Magnum Tan 11 Right BOOT, Ranger Joes Tan 11R Left BOOT, Black 10.5 Right BOOT, Rubber Utility – Grn, Bracket - Night Vision – Three Piece Set, Canteen Cup – Silver, Canster – NEW - Biochem Mask – Grn, Cap - Canteen – Two - Grn NBC, UPC Patrol – 7 1/8, UPC Boonie – 7 1/8, Coat - DCU - Heavy – Chem – 2 Med Short, Lrg Reg, Container - Bugout Cashe - Military Steel 44x7“, Coordinate Scale & Protractor – Clear, Cover - Helmet – Five, 3 BDU, DCU & UPC – NEW, Notebook – BDU, Eyewear Retention – Grn, Face Mask – Artic, Fire Starter – Aviaton Survival Spark Free – Grn, First Aid Pouch W Two Bandages, Flash Light – Grn, Gloves - Brown Wool – Medium, Black Wool – Small, Black Wool – Size 5, Googles – Black – Two Sets, Inserts – Three - Two Black – One Clear. Safty/Shooting Pyramex V2G, Pads – Inserts - Black Knee – XShort Short, Elbow – Reg Long – Two Sets, Knee – Two Sets One BDU & One DCU, Hood - Assembly – Grn - NBC Mask, Hunting Hood – Brown Woodland, Insert - Helmet – Grn, Jacket - Gray Army PT XL?, Long Underwear - Tan Army Cold Weather Gen 3, LBE - Three Sets, BDU 2, Multi Cam, Manual - Helmet – TM2415, Pack - Canvas IDF Butt, Pants BDU – 2 Large Short – Inseam 26.5-29.5, Waist 35-39. DCU – 2 Large Short – Inseam 26.5-29.5, Waist 35-39, DCU – Small Regular – Inseam 29.5-32.5, Waist 27-31, DCU – 2 Small Short – Inseam 26.5-29.5, Waist 27-31, Small 2” Rip, DCU – Small Regular – Inseam 29.5-32.5, Waist 27-31, DCU – Large Short – Inseam 26.5-29.5, Waist 35-39, DCU – 2 Large Regular – Inseam 29.5-32.5, Waist, 35-39, Pouches – Thirteen – One Leg Bag BDU, One Grenade UPC, Two Magazine Rifle BDU, Four - Utility - 2 BDU - Black 2, One Magazine Pistol MC, One Radio DCU, Three Grenade BDU, Shirt - PT T- Gray Army - 7 Medium 3, Unknown 4, BDU – Small Short – Height 63-67, Cheat 33-37, BDU – Large Regular – Height 67-71, Cheat 41-46, DCU – Large Regular – Height 67-71, Cheat 41-46, DCU – 2 Large Regular – Height 67-71, Cheat 41-46, DCU – 2 Small Short – Height 63-67, Cheat 33-37, BDU – Small Short – Height 63-67, Cheat 33-37, Small, Scarf - Wool Green – 54x9”. Shorts - Black Army PT - 7 – XL - 3, L, M, S, Unkown, Strap - Shoulder Four – Three Black – One Tan, Undershirt |Cold Weather – Medium. Water Bladder - Grn 3L With Hose, MRE - Accessory Packs, Food Warmers, Spoons, Empty Bags, Steak Sauce, Hot Beverage Bags, Peanut Butter, Coco French Lemon Lime Orange Vanilla Beverage Powders, Wheat Bread, Interested in (Looking for - Do Not Have) Archery Equipment, (((3XL ACU or Multicam ARMY Uniforms, Generators, MREs))), USGI & Fox Gen II Duffle Bags, Air Conditioners, Electronics (Flat Screen SMART TVs, Smart Phones (NO Flip), Etc), Food, Kayak, 6-8' Folding Table Portable, Galvanized & Plastic Water Tanks, RC Vehicles & Drones, Tools, Good or Dead Riding Lawn Mower, Mopeds/Motorcycles/Scooters.
  7. Hope this brightens your day: Why was school so much easier for cave people? Because they had no history to study! Apparently this was an actual radio conversation: #1: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision." #2: "Recommend that you change YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision." #1: "This is the captain of a U.S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course." #2: "No, I say again, divert YOUR course." #1: "This is the aircraft carrier Enterprise, we are a large warship of the U.S. navy. Divert your course NOW!" #2: "This is a lighthouse. Your call?" "Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever." - Napoleon Bonaparte – Ak Family Scott
  8. Hope this brightens your day: Why was school so much easier for cave people? Because they had no history to study! Apparently this was an actual radio conversation: #1: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision." #2: "Recommend that you change YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision." #1: "This is the captain of a U.S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course." #2: "No, I say again, divert YOUR course." #1: "This is the aircraft carrier Enterprise, we are a large warship of the U.S. navy. Divert your course NOW!" #2: "This is a lighthouse. Your call?" "Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever." - Napoleon Bonaparte – Ak Family Scott
  9. Hope this brightens your day: Why was school so much easier for cave people? Because they had no history to study! Apparently this was an actual radio conversation: #1: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision." #2: "Recommend that you change YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision." #1: "This is the captain of a U.S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course." #2: "No, I say again, divert YOUR course." #1: "This is the aircraft carrier Enterprise, we are a large warship of the U.S. navy. Divert your course NOW!" #2: "This is a lighthouse. Your call?" "Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever." - Napoleon Bonaparte – Ak Family Scott
  10. Hope this brightens your day: Why was school so much easier for cave people? Because they had no history to study! Apparently this was an actual radio conversation: #1: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision." #2: "Recommend that you change YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision." #1: "This is the captain of a U.S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course." #2: "No, I say again, divert YOUR course." #1: "This is the aircraft carrier Enterprise, we are a large warship of the U.S. navy. Divert your course NOW!" #2: "This is a lighthouse. Your call?" "Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever." - Napoleon Bonaparte – Ak Family Scott
  11. Scott,  While we appreciate and enjoy your humor we have to request that you put all of it in General Discussion.  Thanks in advance for your attention to this.

  12. Hope this brightens your day: Dietitian: Did you follow the course that I have given you 4 weeks ago? Client: Yes, of course! Dietitian: So did you lose at least 4lbs ? Client: No! I lost 4 weeks! An old-time pastor was riding furiously down the road, hurrying to get to church on time. Suddenly, his horse stumbled and threw him to the ground. Lying in the dirt, his body wracked with pain, the pastor called out, “All you angels in heaven, help me get up on my horse!” With extraordinary strength, he leaped onto the horse’s back—and fell off the other side. From the ground again, he called out, “All right, just half of you angels this time!” "Remember you will not get a second chance to make a first impression." Todays Technology has advanced to the point we humans can NOT differentiate between the new levels. For example; there is little to be gained between a 2015 Iphone & a 2018 Iphone, except spending $700-900. If you do not purchase a new vehicle every year why purchase a NEW phone? The same is true with Televisions. Whatever the latest/newest “HD/Curve” you will notice NOT notice any real benefit from a 2015 model. Best Hunting Crossbow Scott
  13. Hope this brightens your day: Dietitian: Did you follow the course that I have given you 4 weeks ago? Client: Yes, of course! Dietitian: So did you lose at least 4lbs ? Client: No! I lost 4 weeks! An old-time pastor was riding furiously down the road, hurrying to get to church on time. Suddenly, his horse stumbled and threw him to the ground. Lying in the dirt, his body wracked with pain, the pastor called out, “All you angels in heaven, help me get up on my horse!” With extraordinary strength, he leaped onto the horse’s back—and fell off the other side. From the ground again, he called out, “All right, just half of you angels this time!” "Remember you will not get a second chance to make a first impression." Todays Technology has advanced to the point we humans can NOT differentiate between the new levels. For example; there is little to be gained between a 2015 Iphone & a 2018 Iphone, except spending $700-900. If you do not purchase a new vehicle every year why purchase a NEW phone? The same is true with Televisions. Whatever the latest/newest “HD/Curve” you will notice NOT notice any real benefit from a 2015 model. Best Hunting Crossbow Scott
  14. Hope this brightens your day: Dietitian: Did you follow the course that I have given you 4 weeks ago? Client: Yes, of course! Dietitian: So did you lose at least 4lbs ? Client: No! I lost 4 weeks! An old-time pastor was riding furiously down the road, hurrying to get to church on time. Suddenly, his horse stumbled and threw him to the ground. Lying in the dirt, his body wracked with pain, the pastor called out, “All you angels in heaven, help me get up on my horse!” With extraordinary strength, he leaped onto the horse’s back—and fell off the other side. From the ground again, he called out, “All right, just half of you angels this time!” "Remember you will not get a second chance to make a first impression." Todays Technology has advanced to the point we humans can NOT differentiate between the new levels. For example; there is little to be gained between a 2015 Iphone & a 2018 Iphone, except spending $700-900. If you do not purchase a new vehicle every year why purchase a NEW phone? The same is true with Televisions. Whatever the latest/newest “HD/Curve” you will notice NOT notice any real benefit from a 2015 model. Best Hunting Crossbow Scott
  15. Hope this brightens your day: Dietitian: Did you follow the course that I have given you 4 weeks ago? Client: Yes, of course! Dietitian: So did you lose at least 4lbs ? Client: No! I lost 4 weeks! An old-time pastor was riding furiously down the road, hurrying to get to church on time. Suddenly, his horse stumbled and threw him to the ground. Lying in the dirt, his body wracked with pain, the pastor called out, “All you angels in heaven, help me get up on my horse!” With extraordinary strength, he leaped onto the horse’s back—and fell off the other side. From the ground again, he called out, “All right, just half of you angels this time!” "Remember you will not get a second chance to make a first impression." Todays Technology has advanced to the point we humans can NOT differentiate between the new levels. For example; there is little to be gained between a 2015 Iphone & a 2018 Iphone, except spending $700-900. If you do not purchase a new vehicle every year why purchase a NEW phone? The same is true with Televisions. Whatever the latest/newest “HD/Curve” you will notice NOT notice any real benefit from a 2015 model. Best Hunting Crossbow Scott
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