I was born and raised in southern California never leaned completely left I'd say I was more center left. I got the usual Ca Marxist indoctrination , never knew I was being taught to be a commie. Took the red pill over time. First experience was dealing with planned parenthood , I was hard core on women's rights due to my abusive father and how he treated my mom and talked about women. When I started getting more involved with them I noticed more and more how cult like they were. Finally took a trip to the state capital to lobby with them and I was shocked at how vicious they were to each other and how filthy and dirty they were , their filthy talk around the table at restaurants, informant culture, fanaticism and so on. I dropped out and stopped volunteering after that. The cult like behavior was a slap in the face , I knew something was wrong. I still had the women's rights idea so I tried getting involved online, found the same exact mentality and a lot of totalitarianism. I remember being told as a kid never let anyone think for you, and that's what these people were trying to do. I kept trying to figure out what was wrong, argued with them some but just saw more and more of the same behavior I saw with Planned Parenthood. Bewildered I dropped out of that too. As time went buy the news of the gang rapes in Cologne Germany was going around. I was outraged but the first thing that hit me was how silent the left was. When I was involved with feminist groups online and in real life I remember them being so fanatical that they insisted if you didn't "identify as feminist" you were doing something wrong. I never called myself that and I used to argue with them about it thinking what fanatics they were. Now I was seeing them throw women under the bus for a bunch of rapists and murderers who were Muslim. It was this that got me reading right wing literature, going to right wing web sites voting for Trump and eventually watching a ton of Jordan Peterson videos. I learned from him about human nature and evolution , watching his bible series made me realize that the bible and such books actually do have a value whether you believe in a literal god or not. The atheist groups I was involved with now seemed so petty and small minded, they were fighting against the religious right which I was sure had a lot in common with people like Bin Laden. In reality Christianity had at it's core the value of the individual and served as the catalyst for the enlightenment values that lead to the freest and most successful culture there is. These old books couched things in religious terms because that's what people believed back then. When science slowly eroded religious belief and we lost the ability to believe in a god it caused the madness of nihilism to set in. I could see that so clearly, people now questioned everything , they became amoral and confused, looked for answers elsewhere and it caused massive death and suffering. Once I learned why the books said what they said and had the insight of psychological evolution I began to get the message without having to be placated with "because god said so". Now I suppose my god is nature if I have a god. Understanding the functioning of nature made me respect the messages of books like the bible. It made me look at life differently, I wasn't afraid of natural things I could understand why society works the way it does , why people behave the way they do and I could accept it. Before I was taught that the world around me wasn't fair and it was the fault of evil greedy people etc etc all the far left garbage we're all familiar with. My respect for nature stayed with me as I continued to read right wing sights including the alt right. Channels on youtube such as Millennial Woes filled in the gaps that Peterson left. The alt right too respected nature and introduced me to that aspect of nature and psychology that Peterson and the like were afraid to touch. That aspect having to do with race. Only the truth will suffice if you really want to get anywhere and the alt right were not afraid of truths that even Peterson won't address. The alt right are a mixed bag, they run the gamut from outright Nazis to identitarians to white nationalists. I couldn't buy into the totalitarian ideology of the Nazis and don't see it as an answer as some do. Racial identitarianism only accepts race but ethno-nationalism seems to me to fall most in line with how human beings actually evolved. We're tribal and lived apart for so long as to develop actual physical adaptions for living in the arias we lived in, Europe, Asia, Africa and so on. All look different, and are even different inside right to the bone. To think that there are not different mental tendencies and emotional shades to races of people seemed foolish in that light. I can't buy into the Nazi (nat soc) concept of a superior race, their are just too many variables. Whites developed technology but we might make ourselves extinct with it as well, so it's not necessarily a mark of superiority. Blacks have on average a lower IQ but that may not mean much in the larger scheme of things. Totalitarian systems also fail due to lack of investment in them by individual members. All the power and loyalty to the system is at the top. The English liberal system we live under currently seems to make the most sense but I feel it was successful because it was propped up by our natural preference for our own race. When the aracial nature of it finally floated to the top and people begin to act as honest English liberals . The universal man idea etc caused us to mix in races of people more and more until you have the unrest you see today. I feel now that some sort of ethnic arraignment such as we were successful with in the past is the way forward but it can not rely on human instinct alone, it must be codified into the law. English liberalism while it respects the individual is still collectivist, it succeeds because it is not so collectivist as to smother the individual ambition that drives it. Racial nationalism is inherently collectivist as well but I feel that it too can maintain a level of individualism if it respects what English liberalism taught us. This will keep ambition from being snuffed out and we can reap the same rewards. I suppose I'm talking about an enlightenment 2.0 patched for the aracial vulnerability. It makes sense because it is organic, not forced. We're not fighting against nature at that point but working with it. So that's what I think and greetings to any of my fellow white nationalists on the boards.