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Hope this brightens your day:

 

I was standing in line in a bank one day when a teenager called out in a loud voice, "Did anyone lose a big wad of bills with a rubber band around it?" Two men and a woman quickly called out, "I did!" The teenager responded saying, "Well I found the rubber band!"

 

A father texts his son: "My dear son, today is a day you will treasure for all the days of your life. My best love and good wishes. Your Father." His son texts back: "Thanks Dad. But the wedding isn't actually until tomorrow!" His Father replies: "I know."

 

When facts speak for themselves, you need to be sure that you know their language.

 

A young deer in the woods learned to use all four hooves equally well... He was known to be bambidextrous.

 

After weeks of getting the cold shoulder from his wife, the unhappy husband finally confronted her. "Admit it, Linda. The only reason you married me is because my grandfather left me $10 million." "Don't be ridiculous," she replied. "I don't care who left it to you."

 

"Practice is the desire to become perfect. If you have no desire, why do we strive for perfection?"

 

Scott

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